Short Story

This is a story about Mr. Man.  Mr. Man has very strong morals.

One day Mr. Man was acting in a play called "Our Country's Good", about the first convict ship that sailed to Australia in 1788, and how they pulled together and put on a play for the colony.  It was no surprise that Mr. Man got the lead role, he was a very good actor.  There were some bumps along the winding road of rehearsing; lines got mixed up,  he rubbed cast members the wrong way, cast members rubbed him the wrong way. However, overall things started to come together; lines got remembered, cast members united.

But, as with all good stories Mr. Man ran into a major bump in the road.  A bump that threatened his belief that it was morally acceptable to act in this play.  Now Mr. Man also knows that it would be morally unacceptable to abandon his fellow actors, however he also knows that it would be morally unacceptable to act in a play where someone is dressed in blackface. Yes... Blackface.



"But don't you want to want to see this particular person in blackface?" I asked Mr. Man in a joking manner.

"Nope" He replied.

"Why not?" I asked, hoping to get a more juicy response from him.

"Because, it is incredibly offensive." He said while wearing his well-isn't-it-obvious face.

Now I can't know what will happen next. However, that won't stop me from postulating what can possibly happen if there IS blackface in the play.  The following is an self-centered dramatized account of what will happen and what I will do if operation blackface takes effect...


"Ok... Let's re-enforce the day..." Kevin Colman, our director, says after a day of Tuesday rehearsal.  I can tell that something bothers him as he leans back in his chair and runs his hand through where his hair used to be. 

There is a long silence. Apparently I am not the only one who feels that something is wrong with Kevin.  Jill reluctantly starts the process, she hesitates when speaks, as if expecting Kevin to stop her in the middle of her re-enforcement.  She finishes and points to Alex who then begins to re-enforce as well. Eventually this goes on until the job comes to me, and if this isn't said already I will say it myself.

"Um... I would like to re-enforce Kevin for doing one hell of a job with this play.  Um... Has anyone seen Mr. Man?" The room is silent.

"Finish the re-enforcement."  Kevin interjects, implying that he has something to say at the end.

I finish doing my thing, and listen as everyone else continues to awkwardly finish their own, knowing that some bad news is coming once re-enforcement is over.

"We are all amazing actors are we not?" says Kevin when re-enforcement is passed to him. "And Amazing actors have the ability to 'Transcend personal feelings in the theater'" he continued quoting the play. "Yet sometimes we have reactions that cause us to feel like what we are doing is not the right thing to do.  Mr. Man has had this reaction with our recent decision to use makeup on the part of the aborigine.  Now Mr. Man and I have talked for a good long while.  We have come to the decision that maybe it is best if he does not stay for the play. " There is a visible deflation of confidence from the cast. " Don't worry.  I have actors lined up willing to jump in and fill his role if he is not back by tomorrow.  I do hope that he will come back, however that won't stop me from going and making the calls that I need to make if we are to continue without him."

Kevin continued his speech, however most of us knew what this meant. Mr. Man was gone. Out of the blue, it was as if he had committed acting suicide, leaving us on our own, abandoned and alone.

The play eventually goes up despite the major setback, and the sudden disappearance of Mr. Man in the community.  The whole cast thinks that he will come to at least watch the play, however his morals disallow him to even watch something so offensive as blackface.

THE END

Song of the day: "I Turn My Camera On" By Spoon on their album Gimme Fiction

Moral of the story: Happy endings are for suckas